Tag Archives: mustard phobia

Pizza Goddess, Part 2

14 Jul

It’s not always easy working with aspiring goddesses. Or shall I call them goddettes? These are the 16 year olds for whom this job is their very first. Pizza virgins. I admit, they bring a certain youthful charm to the snack bar. They are, on the whole, cheerful and agreeable, and work well once they figure out what they need to do. But they are still on that border between adulthood and childhood, and it is not infrequent when they slip backwards. I’ll give you an example. Let’s call our goddette Pepper. Pepper is the most hard working goddette at the snack bar. She’s fun and flirty (first at the window when Apollo appears). She’ll do most any job, except one. She won’t refill the mustard. Pepper can not stand to be near it. The last time we worked together she asked, ever so nicely, if I wouldn’t mind refilling the mustard. Not only does mustard creep her out, she explained, but the ketchup had already touched her. To Pepper, a possible assault by a second sauce was intolerable. How does one respond to this peculiar condiment phobia? Is there even a word for it? I’d be happy to hear from anyone who knows. And yet, there are some for whom mustard brings great fulfillment. Johnny Wolf had to stop a young boy who was sitting at one of our tables and happily squirting mustard straight from the bright yellow bottle into his wide open mouth. The boy blushed and handed the bottle back. But not wanting to disappoint a customer, however young, Mr Wolf filled up a little cup with mustard for the boy’s enjoyment. My heart goes out to anyone who had to be in a closed, confined area with the boy as the condiment worked itself through his system.

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